Developing routines to begin understanding the world.

As adults we have a very specific and measured understanding of time, 5:00am alarm goes off, Saturday sleep in late, 7:35am 5 minutes late to work, for infants their understanding of their day is not focused on a clock but rather routines. Play, eat, sleep, play, eat, sleep and as they grow that becomes more complex to include things like bath time, walking the dog, and reading a story not until they are around four do children begin to understand days of the week, periods of time, past, and future.

One source of stress for infants and toddlers is when they don’t understand what is going on or when they believe something different should be going on. When that routine changes or when the day is not in a routine at all children tend to get stressed out, cry, have tantrums, and not listen. As adults we work to create routines children can understand not only to avoid all the stress responses listed above but also to support children’s understanding of their world and beginning to understand time. Parents should begin to think about creating routines starting from birth to help children understand their world which will reduce their stress and create more happy times. 

In the classroom, we work to create routines in our classrooms that the children can understand. For morning group time each day we sing ‘The More We Get Together’ and amazingly (or not) after just a few weeks children as young as 12 months will begin to take that song as a cute to come to the group area, without direction. Parents often ask “How do you get them all to sleep at the same time?” We know they are tired, we create a climate for sleeping, turn off the lights, turn on soft music. We use the same routine every day, get your mat, get your blankie, sing one song, read one story, and say goodnight. 

It takes time to develop a routine and even after it is developed sometimes children fight it or it must get changed but taking the time to develop routines is important for children’s learning and your sanity. Think about the world from their perspective, people are picking you up moving you around, putting you to sleep, feeding you, playing with you and if you had no idea when and no time to prepare for a new thing happening it would be frightening and upsetting. Start from infancy by telling your baby “I am going to pick you up” each time you pick them up; they will start to relate those words, pattern, and tones and be able to prepare themselves. Use songs as transitional routines (going to the car, going to the table for dinner, etc.) and for more difficult transitions such as settling down to sleep use a song and a book. As children begin to understand the routines things will begin to move smoother and children will be much happier. 

Questions or comments on routines you use in your house are welcome.

High Cost of Child Care

I have been reading the findings from the 2011 Parents and the High Cost of Child Care report published by the National Child Care Resource and Referral Agency and the results are quite sad. Parents throughout the United States are struggling to afford child care and in many instances quality is sacrificed because parents simply can’t afford a quality facility.

In Virginia the average cost of full time center based care for an infant is $8,800 per year. As many of you know care in Charlottesville is much more expensive but using the statistics from the report the average two-parent family 9.7% of their income on infant care, 31.2% of single parent income is spent on child care. Virginia is not the worst by far there are other states where child care is 16% of two parent median income. When parents have more than one child in care it becomes even less affordable. If you’re interested in additional data on Virginia or other states I would be happy to share it with you or you can access the report at http://www.naccrra.org/publications/naccrra-publications/publications/Cost%20Report%202011.pdf

One of the most real numbers parents can relate to is the cost of care compared to public college tuition. Many parents spend years saving for college tuition however in 36 states the annual cost of full time child care in a center is higher that public college tuition. Virginia misses that statistic by $14, the average cost of care being $8,800 and the average tuition and fees and a public college in Virginia is $8,814. The most upsetting part is that public assistance through grants and loans are available if a child chooses to attend college whereas parents to continue working must place their child in some type of care and there is no assistance available. Families don’t have 18 years to save for the cost of infant care. There are some other options for families that cannot afford center based care but other care arrangements are unregulated for health, safety, background checks, and of unknown quality.  

As families of middle incomes struggle the low income families are hit even harder, many families can’t afford to send their child to a high quality center. The result is children that don’t have the social, emotional, and cognitive skills to prepare them for public school. The public ends up paying more to support and assist these children that didn’t have a proper foundation for education.

Hopefully as we share these startling facts we can start to work together to change the system to support young children and their families during this critical developmental period.